I'm losing it

I don't know if I'm just imagining it or something, but in chinese night lesson he seemed to keep looking at me. I really can't be sure. I'm seriously losing it. I need to get away.

runn-away. yeah.

I'm suffering.

I'm drowning.

I'm dying, and no one seems to notice.

Everything seems unreal to me in the day; I'm beginning to feel reality only when I read, or more often, during the times where I lie in bed and think whether all this is real or not. The chinese test tonight already seems so far away... Tomorrow I've gotta go out and make shirts. It's almost certain that I'm going to view it as unreal tomorrow night...as of Wednesday's tests.

The world is hollow, rotten from its core all the way out.

I don't even know how I cut myself last night. i don't even remember how I cut myself. I don't even know whether I cut myself subconsciously, or I scratched myself on something.

There's something seriously wrong with me.

Maybe I've been hurt by him. "A friendship lost is an act of betrayal". Wise words, from a wise mouth, from a wise friend. I'm glad I still have my di. I wish things were otherwise, but...

I've lost my soul; I've lost my heart, I've lost my will.

Save me. He who knows what it's like to be the last one standing.