Gray Sky Morning

WHOO no blogging in a long time... Had astro last night, which was really tiring cause of little kids running around... It makes you wonder if we deserve it for causing our own seniors so much trouble. And if only when we were younger if we hadn't caused them so much trouble, would we be getting trouble right now?

Anyways, Mr Ng has apparently found a new job. Wow what a nice way to end a half year "not working" spree. XD. He's leaving on 12 August, and I have a feeling it's at about 5 something according to the schedule on the SIA website. It's so useful. Yet kinda not sure if you don't have real places and dates of the flights. So we'll see.

We're thinking of meeting up with him on that day, at least those who can. There's PE on that day at 4.30pm, so yeah we had better just try to get back on time. If his flight is even at 5pm hahas.

It's so sad. But a part of life I guess. I'm going to cry... Haizz.

On a lighter note, China trip is next week. Briefing on 18th (a Friday), and then we're off. Hooray. Haizz I really hope most of us can go see Mr Ng off. Really alot of things happening; China, Tioman, Mr Ng leaving, just finished some scouts-astronomy collaboration. IR just started, and we're like going to Japan to present our project when we're done...

Sometimes I wish I had a friend from Temasek here. Just watched the Temasek videos again; read my Espace profile thing, which said that I was going to join water sports... It's such a long time ago that we did that, and so many things have changed since then. And seeing all the Temasek people in the video, I wished I was still with them. Many things have indeed changed... I need to go back to them one day. I'm going to cry again... Today's a sad day for me I guess.

It just shows how easy it is for me to fall apart I guess. And I can't help but think how we're all falling apart already, and going our own seperate ways. Johno isn't coming over alot anymore to slack with me; Raddy doesn't talk as much to me anymore. Kor's the same as always; he's mellowed a little and puts up with my crap abit more... YH and MH and even Bao are so busy nowadays, what with flying, or IR or council, it's hard to find time to even talk with them. Aaron's doing his music stuff, Pam and Char and even Michelle are doing their new band thing, or some other music stuff... Ryan's always DOTAing or in Counterstrike Source; Mel's kinda going for alot of of symposiums and stuff and I'm not seeing her as much as before... And a whole host of other people are always too busy to like just DO stuff.

I feel like going out with sponge. That's what best friends do. It's also something I haven't done in a long time. Everytime we go out I have to drag someone along with me, and it always just feeling like they're tagging along, instead of having fun. And there's always the feeling like tehy would rather not be here at all, and it spoils the whole thing. Even from Johno...

I really miss the old days. And yeah I almost cried again...

Looking out my window now, all I see are clouded skies, and oddly enough, they're exactly how my life feels right now. And I know you're supposed to look for silver linings and ray of sunshines, but sometimes, like now, it's horribly difficult.

I have so much to do now, and it feels like Alain leaving all over again.

I will NEVER, NEVER, NEVER do anything like that to my friends. Ever.

I can't. And I won't. I did it once. And now I know how they felt. And I've left them far behind. It's just not worth it. Not one bit. And so guys; I'm sorry. I'll be back one day. I just need you people to wait. And believe. And trust me, even though I don't deserve it at all. Cause one day, I'll be back. And this time, I'll be the one waiting for you to come back.

I love you all.